First Appointment Next Week…

[Ma'at]

Looking at the post you linked to:

The letter from your doctor must be similar to that shown below. It must state that the change you are undergoing is permanent.

How would my GP be able to state that when I'm still awaiting an official diagnosis? Will that not matter to them?

The whole system they have still seems a little strange to me. I spoke to my psychologist about my gender identity at the middle of last year, I then seen a nurse at the Gender Dysphoria Service 6 months after that, and now I have to wait another 4 to see a doctor for my 'official' diagnosis. Over which time, I've been told if I change my name and the way I dress day-to-day and I'll be allowed HRT pretty much as soon as the diagnosis is given. Great – but surely the absence of an official diagnosis or contact with the service makes that more difficult than it needs to be.

I'm curious to know what stage of transition you were all at when you got around to changing your name. I'm still using my old name when communicating with strangers, largely because I'm presenting as male most of the time. I'm taking the advice of a number of people on this forum by taking things slowly—adopting a more androgynous look—but the nurse I seen left me a little puzzled over my current appearance. She said I 'looked feminine' but suggested my clothing might not be feminine enough. I suppose my daily clothes still are on the 'boyish' side (t-shirt and skinny jeans), but what am I supposed to be dressing like right now? I asked for clarification on what would be expected from me by others in the service, but she seemed rather unsure herself.

I know I'm rambling a bit, but I'm feeling rather cut off from others given my difficulty in getting through to my local support group. In one ear I'm being told 'Slowly, slowly catchy monkey' and in the other I'm being told 'You'll have to pick up the pace if you want any kind of treatment'.

[Christine]

I think it depends on the GP. Mine was happy enough to prescribe finasteride in the absence of an official diagnosis, for example, and seemed okay with using her own initiative to determine that I was a genuine case. I changed my name pretty much as soon as I'd seen the local "gatekeeper", admittedly against his advice (his caution was dismissed as soon as I saw someone at the GIC) which was seven months before my first appointment at CX.

There is no dress code, at least not officially, though the view seems to vary depending on the clinician. My first couple of appointments were very much androgynous, and though I could say "I'm wearing 100% women's clothing", that women's clothing consisted of jeans and a tee shirt. Though as time passed I became happier wearing nice blouses and heels, though I still haven't been prised out of my jeans yet, except for the very rare occasion I'll actually wear a skirt! In fact I specifically didn't wear a skirt to my last appointment in case I was assumed to be making a point.

As for being prescribed hormones, my understanding is that standard practice is to approve them on the second appointment, by which time they've had a chance for two clinicians to assess you: at least that's how it's done at CX, anyway. People who've self-medicated can apparently queue jump and get them on their first appointment so that their treatment is being monitored in a classic case of it not paying to play by the rules! Though from what I can tell, the exact procedure seems very variable: those looking at it from a positive viewpoint would say it's evidence that each case is dealt with individually and tailored for the particular client; those from a negative viewpoint would say it's inconsistent and little better than organised chaos...

[Ma'at]

My first couple of appointments were very much androgynous, and though I could say "I'm wearing 100% women's clothing", that women's clothing consisted of jeans and a tee shirt.

When during all this did you adopt a bra? I'd imagine that would be the defining moment of social transition; the addition of breasts make a big change regardless of how neutral your choice of clothes are.

[Christine]

When during all this did you adopt a bra? I'd imagine that would be the defining moment of social transition; the addition of breasts make a big change regardless of how neutral your choice of clothes are.

I haven't, much to the continuing disdain of my other half! I'm lazy and still too small to require one (unless my daily exercise gets a little frantic), and a 42AA is pretty much impossible for me to find. For me, my social transition was really defined the first time I was referred to by a stranger in the feminine sense without any prompting, which happened several times on the day of my appointment last June: although I was officially female long before then, that day was a real turning-point in my life. Although now it's just a regular thing and I can't remember the last time anyone even suggested I was male, that's a day that will stay with me.

[Casaluna]

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