Hello and a info please on being an 'active' TS

[Vicki]

Now those are superb posts! Finally, things start to make sense and I can see a clearer picture. Thanks so much!

[Vicki]

Howdy all,


Sorry for the late reply but I've been doing a lot of thinking and needed time out. I won't bore you with the ins and outs but suffice it to say I've been trying to get a handle on whether my desire to transition is real or just 'a nice idea in principle', whether it's real and I should go for it or whether I'm too old to start now, and a hundred other things to be taken into consideration.

One of the conclusions I've come to is that if I do transition, the chaces of me finding love (or even a relationship) are pretty much zero so there's going to be little point in having a working penis after all! I'm also booking in with Dr Lorimer of Gendercare for psych evals in the new year. However, I still have a few questions regarding the male member.

1) Is it possible to take HRT without shrinking him? I assume there is as there's plenty of well-endowed trans porn stars and I'm not built like a porn star so I cant afford to lose any if I want to stay active!

2) If shrinkage is unavoidable, is it reversible if - worst case scenario - I go on HRT then decide its not for me, after all? (Apparently 50%+ quit the transition process).

[Steffi]

Hi

In brief - HRT will cause some shrinkage of the penis and more so of the testicles. Up to a point, the longer the HRT goes on the more things shrink.
However if HRT is stopped within APPROXIMATELY about a year of starting, the changes will reverse without lasting ill effect.
- the amount of time until some degree of irreversible change occurs will vary somewhat from person to person.
(The same principle applies to the growth of breast tissue and to the other feminising effects which are based on the redistribution of fat. Any fibrous breast tissue which develops will remain, although it too may shrink if hormones are withdrawn.)

Those who probably should not be taking hormones will realise that quite quickly. The first breast-buds will be apparent after a couple of months but so will the mental effects of hormones. By six months in you will certainly know whether they suit you or not.
Testosterone *IS* sex and as a male you cannot help living within that bubble.
If HRT suits you, then it is likely to change your thought processes. The entire question of how well you function sexually is likely to greatly diminish in value.

Would I, as a post-op like to have my original sex-drive back now? - I think not. It would be good to have a little of it back but if I had it all then I would just stay home all day masturbating ........ BECAUSE I would have the male hyper sex-drive and the highly sexualised vision of women that goes with it.
So ....... although it is quite an appealing idea to relive all those fantasies I had as a cross-dresser, but now with actual breasts and a vagina, in truth I would not want that same sex-drive back again. I am much happier now, at peace within myself and happy to indulge in sexual activity when *I* choose, rather than it dominate and direct my life.

Hormones change how you think and feel in a way which is difficult for a male to even imagine.
Take them for six to twelve months and see where your own mind is at by then ...... you'll see! (....assuming that HRT does suit you)

[Vicki]

Thanks for the info. It's good to know that the effect would be reversible if it wasn't for me. I'm pretty sure I'd find out well before 12 months - more like 3-6 months at the absolute max- so the window you speak of, though approximate, is great news.

I also agree about the importance of the question will probably diminish (and losing my sex drive wouldn't be the be-all-and-end-all I once thought it would be). The change in thought process would also be welcome as even I get worn out by my libido - I'd love an 'off' switch. Then there's the fact that sexuality can change when on HRT and your desire to penetrate can recede, too, so it's not 'I must keep my male sex function at all costs' anymore.

Having said that, as a lover of females and a desire to stay that way (though, perversely, it would be easier, if I was to transition, to change sexual preference) having a working penis would still be of importance - hence my quetions - in the unlikely event I find a woman who wants to be with a TS. However, not to get too despondent, I've pretty much written off finding someone as a guy, so I'm at peace with not having anyone post-transition.

Out of interest, what's this highly sexualised female vision you mention? I thought it's men that are the visual ones and women the emotional ones.

[Steffi]

Out of interest, what's this highly sexualised female vision you mention? I thought it's men that are the visual ones and women the emotional ones.

Hi

I meant that because men have a highly sexualised notion of who women are, they make incorrect assumptions of how women "must therefore" think and feel etc.
e.g. - to illustrate by making very generalised and sweeping statements - men are looking for a Sh*g and will consider any female to satisfy that urge. Most men assume that women have a similar drive and priority.
Most women however are primarily looking for a man they "click with" ...... who they may then Sh*g. Women probably tend to be more demisexual http://demisexuality.org/articles/what- ... sexuality/

That projection of male sexuality onto females leads to those well-known misinterpretations that by the way she was dressed "she was asking for it" and that because a couple of women go out for an evening together and are fairly dressed-up etc men think that they are obviously on the hunt for sex......whereas they most probably aren't and just did go out to socailise together.

re post-transition sex ...... there are men and women who are interested and dating sites catering to that.
There are a lot of men who actually seek transvestites and/or pre and post op transsexuals who we colloquially call "the chasers"
I do some domination as a Mistress and get a steady average of two enquiries a week. I'm on TvChix http://tvchix.com/index.php
(I have made it clear that I am not simply seeking a boyfriend.....yet I STILL get occasional offers for a simple non-kink meet.)

Finding "romance" and a lasting partner is a lot more difficult, but it does still happen. e.g. The 60 year old transsexual who is (or was) my regular submissive got a date from a 45 year old guy on Chix (which is also where I met her from) and it has turned into an ongoing relationship. He recently took her to a reunion meet-up with former army buddies and happily introduced her as his girlfriend.
- I know of others .....it does happen.