Stopping hormones today, op in December

[SarahG]

I cant get the f*cking dilator in and the nurses have no clue how to help other than wait till morning

[Cassie]

Hi Sarah,

DON'T PANIC!

It won't close up overnight and it's often difficult to find the spot to start with. They really should have reassured you of that.

You're a mess down there, there's scar tissue, scabs and goodness knows what. It's awkward and it can hurt too. But it will get better

As for frequency I can't remember if it was 3 or 4 times a day to start with and yes douche after every one initially. As you go on the frequency will reduce until eventually you're once a week and it slides in and out nicely.

But to reiterate - don't worry - keep reminding the nurses to help you and all will be well.

C

[SarahG]

I ended up waiting until morning after spending an hour on the phone to my partner in tears.

The care at Parkside is so bad. Not the nurses fault, they're just knackered from 12 hour shifts. One managed to leave a used needle in my bed.

Got home Weds and was in local A&E thursday night with a pretty hardcore uti that caused me to black out at one point.

No energy, no idea how im gonna dilate today given even going to the toilet is taking everything. I also still haven't figured out how to relax the muscles down there. All the torso muscles are perma-tense on me and have been since a serious car accident in 2004.

Oh yeah, and I can't pee straight. It keeps going over my bum cheeks and soaking my stitches.

[Cassie]

Oh yeah, and I can't pee straight. It keeps going over my bum cheeks and soaking my stitches.

- That happened to me too but it sorted itself out when the hair grew back. I always wondered what that hair was for!!! You'll go through the loo roll for a couple of weeks

Dilating is very difficult and painful in the early days. As I said there's loads of scars and scabs and because the body is treating what's happened as an injury you get lots of swelling too which makes getting anything in quite difficult. Just take time and keep working it with the smallest dilator and loads and loads of lube. Hopefully you'll get it in gradually. Use a mirror to try and find the right spot (In my case it wasn't where I thought it was!). Have plenty of baths too and try to relax - difficult I know

[Cas1999]

Don't worry about the pee'ing 'problem' as it will improve as all of the swelling and scar tissue goes down.
The other suggestions re using a mirror and having a warm bath all worked for me to get through those early days, I had great trouble finding the right angle at first but once found it got a lot easier. Relax in the knowledge that it will get a lot easier.