... risks and psychological and physical after operation FTM if wrong, other questions and am I trans

[somethingorother]

I want to get an operation FTM, because I don't want to be a woman. But I'm not sure if that is, because of gender dysphoria or my other reasons, since I don't interpretate my emotions very well at times or notice them if they are negative, unless they are aggressive, violently strong, or until they stop me from functioning for longer than 4 days.
I'll need some idea of the consequences and risks of this plan. So I went to the ones with experience.

Questions:
What will happen if i have that operation if I'm not trans?
How is the gender dysphoria for that? (or now for some of you, or if you had it and regretted it bc apparently you were not trans despite what you thought)

I'm already feeling non-functioning levels of angst, fear, depressed and aggression. Will it worsen that?

What or where can i find the FTM operation failure rate regarding deformities, permanent bad effects etc. and chances of it?
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(no need to read under if don't want to answer that same old question)


Obligatory question: Am I trans?
cause I can't really connect emotionally enough with myself to find out. Come with your best guess if you want.
(based on signs of dysphoria)

I don't like being called man or woman. Girl or boy. Nothing or anything else about it.
I don't think I am trans, since I don't constantly state that I am a man.

When I was little I played like a girl (dolls, dresses etc.). Now I get embrasd to wear or do girly stuff. Though I can wear a thin pink t-shirt now when its hot outside without embrsdment, I still can't download the sims 4 or paint my nails.

I find both genders distasteful, how they are and bodily, but have never tried being a man.

Both's genetalias are disgusting (avoid touching myself there hate it, and others genetals), though touching breasts are nice and annoying in some situations.

I'm attracted to men and don't like it. Actual sensual and sexual things make me uncomfortable and aggressive. Being touched non-passively (if hands are on me they should not move just lay there) and non-sexually during cuddling, i hate that.

I don't want a beard or change my face or get body hair,
but I do want the change in strength, change in muscle positions and size, fat positions, body type and bone strength and size.

I don't know if I will like no breasts, I want to stop wearing constricting things on my chest and have them be smaller. Can't think what it will be like emotionally to have none. I've tried binders and i like the results, but again that might be, because i want smaller breasts (without constriction). I think i will prefer it, but why might not be about gender and might not reflect emotionally after removal.

[Ice Maiden]

First of all welcome and Hi!

You ask a lot of question please read through the FTM section of this forums! It will answer many of your concerns and this is all from Trans+men!

I will attempt to give you a broad spectrum response to your questions

RESPONSES IN BOLD

Questions: What will happen if i have that operation if I'm not trans?

What operation? Some are irreversible.

I mean you can have top surgery and then have implants if you change your mind but you have to be certain! Bottom surgery can be almost impossible to reverse it just depends how intrusive the surgery is. For example Hysterectomy is pretty conclusive!

How is the gender dysphoria for that? (or now for some of you, or if you had it and regretted it bc apparently you were not trans despite what you thought) I'm already feeling non-functioning levels of angst, fear, depressed and aggression. Will it worsen that?

There are well published examples in the UK of people who do change their mind but quite often years later they change their minds again! This is not an exact science and people do regret it but they tend to be in a minority!

What or where can i find the FTM operation failure rate regarding deformities, permanent bad effects etc. and chances of it? --------------------------------- (no need to read under if don't want to answer that same old question)

You would have to speak to a surgeon and simply ask them at the consultation. They will give you all the stats as they need you to be sure! But surgery has moved on if you go to our 18+ section there are some photos of the results of bottom and top surgery from members of this forum and they are really very impressive!!! In other words a good surgeon will be able to do it for you but BE SURE!

Obligatory question: Am I trans?

Truth is only you can answer that and it may take a lifetime to know for sure! Some know when they are 4 or 5 years old! Some deal with it in their teens but some live a life of marriages cisnormative existence then finally come out! I think you should avoid the term TRANS and ask yourself are you the right gender? I mean do you feel upset with your body how the world treats you do you just feel unwell and dream of or wish you were born male (in your case)? Do you want to be a man? (I am cutting to the chase here rather than using confusing jargon and labels so you may identify as non binary for example) but for the sake of this post it might be easier to be polarised until you can decide for certain.

[Ice Maiden]

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