ftm help?

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DyingNebula

ftm help?

Postby DyingNebula » Wed May 04, 2016 10:08 pm

So I have recently am confident to say that I am FtM Trans after thinking about for a year. Now I don't know what to do from here on out. My parents are excepting and all but when it comes to actually transitioning I have this strong gut feeling they won't like it. Especially considering the fact my Dad was against me getting a binder when I thought I was genderfluid. I'm 18 in almost a month which makes things a little easier. But I don't have the courage to tell my parents this is what I want, nor have I told anyone as a matter of fact, and I don't have the money to do any form transitioning. So I can't afford masculine clothing (It costed me Birthday money and a lot of convincing to get the binder), T, or top surgery if I decide to do it. I have even tried to low-key get my Mom to buy me vitamins that boost T naturally without her knowing, but that's not happening anytime soon. I just don't know what to do. Everything about me is feminine and it's killing me that I can't fix this myself. Is there any advice anyone can give to someone at the start of their FtM transition who can't support themselves financially even once they are able to legally do these things in about a month?

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Ice Maiden
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Re: ftm help?

Postby Ice Maiden » Thu May 05, 2016 3:08 pm

It costed me Birthday money and a lot of convincing to get the binder


Bless you :) I dunno why but this actually made me really feel for you.

You used the term 'Mom' So I can only assume you are in the USA? If not you have the UK medical services via the NHS approach your GP for that.

As for binders, there are a number of Binder Exchange services out there. Trans*men when they have top surgery, no longer need their binders so generously donate them to binder exchanges. There are very cheap to buy usually only the Postage and Packing (shipping) is charged for, as it allows those on low incomes to benefit and these are very WORTHY! So later if you find yourself in a similar position consider donating yours :).

I personally am not certain about the US medicare etc? Or if you have insurance that will cover your needs. Andee here maybe able to put you in touch with a service or group nearby send her a PM? memberlist.php?mode=viewprofile&u=167

The internet is there for you and I suspect you can find support very nearby should you want more than an anonymous exchange.

It is very difficult for many parents to accept their 'little princess who they envisage walking down the aisle in white and grand children etc... Is now their son. That is one heck of a challenge for anyone! Sometimes we get so caught up in our own thoughts and feelings we just forget just how difficult it is for others around us. My advice would be to understand that negative reactions are part of a grieving process. 'loss' of the persob they knew is almost akin to a death. Their daughter can be seen to be dying in front of them. Replaced by 'some guy' they have to get to know all over again. They can also 'blame' themselves' as if it is something they have 'done' or have donated to you via their 'faulty' gene pool.

These are challenging times, but stay strong! You can overcome these hurdles as can those around you. It just takes time. But empathy in both directions rather than tantrums and anger is the way forwards.

I wrote this a long time ago, but take a look at the stages and adapt them to your own situation. Look at the 'stages'. Mourning etc... They can be generalised to anyone facing such life changes. :)
http://library.transgenderzone.com/?page_id=1986
Disclaimer!!!! Please Read! http://media.transgenderzone.com/?page_id=2

"Never believe that a few caring people can't change the world. For, indeed, that's all who ever have." M.Mead

Man [...] must count no one but himself; that he is alone, abandoned on earth in the midst of his infinite responsibilities, without help, with no other aim than the one he sets himself, with no other destiny than the one he forges for himself on this earth." - J.P.Sartre.

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Ice Maiden
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Re: ftm help?

Postby Ice Maiden » Thu May 05, 2016 3:09 pm

#Replies
Disclaimer!!!! Please Read! http://media.transgenderzone.com/?page_id=2

"Never believe that a few caring people can't change the world. For, indeed, that's all who ever have." M.Mead

Man [...] must count no one but himself; that he is alone, abandoned on earth in the midst of his infinite responsibilities, without help, with no other aim than the one he sets himself, with no other destiny than the one he forges for himself on this earth." - J.P.Sartre.

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DyingNebula

Re: ftm help?

Postby DyingNebula » Fri May 13, 2016 10:11 pm

Thanks for the helping as much as you can! I am from the U.S., though! C:

Also sorry this reply is coming in so late. To be honest I forgot I posted this.



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