How do I move on as Transgender?

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Joined: Mon May 09, 2016 1:46 pm

How do I move on as Transgender?

Postby luciemichelle » Mon May 09, 2016 2:11 pm

Hello all,

I am a university student of 34, who is slowly accepting them self as male to female. It has been difficult as I have known since I was a young child of about 4. The feelings of being female are now growing so strong I am having a personal battle in my head with them an I do not know what to do. I have come out o some friends who have been very accepting, I would say that being female not a wish but, becoming a need which has to be addressed. Coupled with Anxiety, it has made the last year terrible time and has had an affect on my studies, but I do not mind resitting the year in a supportive environment.

I dress as a girl in my room, which feels as close to being at peace as possible, it helps me to feel calm. I want to finish my degree as who I am, because not accepting this is making life harder and I know that as a girl I can do this. My family does not know as they will not accept my decision to be who I am; but I am writing for advice on what further steps I can take on my journey through this.

Thanks for any tips,

Lucie. :?:

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Re: How do I move on as Transgender?

Postby Steffi » Mon May 09, 2016 7:10 pm

Hello and welcome.

You need to tell your GP and ask to be referred to a Gender Identity Clinic. If your GP is unsure about how to proceed then there are PDF's on the NHS website to advise GP's.
Do this ASAP - the waiting lists/times are long. Do this even if you are not certain that you will take it all-the-way. No-one will mind if you drop out, they will just pass your slot on to the next person which is good news for them. The waiting - once you are certain that you will proceed - is agonising, so get this ball rolling immediately.

How to proceed further ...... that's a rather vague question if you mean in life in general.
You could locate your local transgender group where you might make some friends, get practical advice and get the opportunity to go out with them as a group.

If you have the money then you ought to start the removal of facial hair as soon as you can - it is a long slow process and often requires you to let facial hair grow a little before each removal session which is embarrassing and inconvenient once you are living in the female role full-time.

If you have female friends who you can hang around with in-role then that is ideal. There is no better way to assimilate a female way of life than to be among born-women where you will gradually and unconsciously learn by imitation.

You could find instruction on the internet and begin working on your female voice. Most find it difficult and you need to practice until it is second nature.
You could also work on your female deportment and body language. e.g. (.....generalisations) Men walk splay-footed. Women swing their hips slightly as part of their gait. Women keep their elbows closer to their body. Men make hand-gestures low down, women do it higher, nearer the face. etc etc ....... there is reams of stuff written about this and pedants arguing the validity and citing exceptions.
- in my view, the bottom line is that the more you conform to a gender stereotype, the more quickly the general public will see you as female.

If you have more questions on specific things to do with transition then I and the others are happy to help. :-)
Contact me privately via "steffi AT transgenderzone DOT com" Click to see Who I am

To those who understand, I extend my hand
To the doubtful I demand, take me as I am
Not under your command, I know where I stand
I won't change to fix your plan, Take me as I am (Dreamtheatre - As I Am)

I have about twenty tracks of me in my prior life as a guitarist up on You-Tube, if anyone wants to check them out ... zkA/videos

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Joined: Mon May 09, 2016 1:46 pm

Re: How do I move on as Transgender?

Postby luciemichelle » Tue May 17, 2016 1:37 pm

Thank you for the advice;

The University have now been informed about the situation my my mental health adviser, as to the situation and why it has been a bad year. I am thinking about transition over the summer and telling my lectures, so they have time to get settled with it. I look forward to being one of the first Trans archaeologists, it will be a challenge but there has to be a first person in everything.

I will find the GP, but I think they are down a little alley some where, but hey ho that is Worcester for you.

On the humerus side, I did get tooted by a van the other day; Ha Ha Ha :gigglersx:

hope you are doing well,

All the best,

Lucie. . :noway: