A little help, please?

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Ice Maiden
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Re: A little help, please?

Postby Ice Maiden » Mon May 02, 2016 4:58 pm

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"Never believe that a few caring people can't change the world. For, indeed, that's all who ever have." M.Mead

Man [...] must count no one but himself; that he is alone, abandoned on earth in the midst of his infinite responsibilities, without help, with no other aim than the one he sets himself, with no other destiny than the one he forges for himself on this earth." - J.P.Sartre.

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Andi
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Re: A little help, please?

Postby Andi » Tue May 03, 2016 11:02 am

It is terrifying at first

And some! The scariest thing I've ever contemplated. I still can't see a way forward with friends & family although there's obviously a way as I'm by no means the first!

I honestly thought I would go to my grave doing nothing about this. You've given me hope and a direction I never thought was there. It still might not be there but at least there's hope. I need time and to think (ie be brave) as well as to talk to others like me. I really appreciate your input - you are exactly what I was looking for, even though I didn't know it at the time!

Andi

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Re: A little help, please?

Postby Ice Maiden » Tue May 03, 2016 5:41 pm

Thank you for your kind words. The really do mean a lot - all this is a thankless task.

Remember, there is no need to suffer, there is always a way, a path, a solution. You have just made the first step to finding it. Noone should die in the gender they have detested all their lives! Living a lie to protect people who when push comes to shove would unlikely care what you think about their actions is painful.

Discovering good people - people you can trust, in a world with throw-away, trolls and fake identities (like Twitter and FB) who by following could potentially out you, ridicule you, or at worse blackmail you, are not the way forward.

The traditional forum (I would say that) that is searchable and easy to use (even as a guest) where you can use a fake id and email to join, micromanaged by long standing activists and group leaders is always better, people on social networks are beginning to realise this. As you cut through all the bs and can feel safe in then knowledge the advice given is based in hard fought battles, and friendships.

All the best and as they say

Don't be a stranger ;)
Disclaimer!!!! Please Read! http://media.transgenderzone.com/?page_id=2

"Never believe that a few caring people can't change the world. For, indeed, that's all who ever have." M.Mead

Man [...] must count no one but himself; that he is alone, abandoned on earth in the midst of his infinite responsibilities, without help, with no other aim than the one he sets himself, with no other destiny than the one he forges for himself on this earth." - J.P.Sartre.

Who am I?
viewtopic.php?f=44&t=30

User avatar
Ice Maiden
Tech Support
Tech Support
Posts: 6063
Joined: Tue Apr 13, 2010 12:19 pm
Location: Nr London

Re: A little help, please?

Postby Ice Maiden » Tue May 03, 2016 5:41 pm

#Replies
Disclaimer!!!! Please Read! http://media.transgenderzone.com/?page_id=2

"Never believe that a few caring people can't change the world. For, indeed, that's all who ever have." M.Mead

Man [...] must count no one but himself; that he is alone, abandoned on earth in the midst of his infinite responsibilities, without help, with no other aim than the one he sets himself, with no other destiny than the one he forges for himself on this earth." - J.P.Sartre.

Who am I?
viewtopic.php?f=44&t=30


Andi
Posts: 4
Joined: Wed Apr 27, 2016 4:03 pm

Re: A little help, please?

Postby Andi » Tue May 03, 2016 7:37 pm

Believe me, it's not a thankless task from my point of view and not, I suspect, from a great many others before and after me!

I don't do any social media and for that I am eternally grateful. Never have, never will.

Living a lie to protect people who when push comes to shove would unlikely care what you think about their actions is painful.


Trust me, I'm not actually protecting anyone by not being honest, apart from myself. This fear of what people think of me (or what I think people might think of me!) is like several millstones around my neck and then some more. As I think I said earlier, it goes way deeper than what we're discussing - at the moment I couldn't even have a single earring for fear of what people might think and that's something "real men" often get. Even getting a different masculine hairstyle would make me anxious!

I think a good way forward for me would be to get a professional makeover (way beyond the train-crash I would make) to see how I would look. I'm old (51) but I'm hopeful that I actually might look OK. If that were the case, it would be a huge boost in moving forward.

I need to think and then I need to search out the Beaumont people.

These last few days I've felt less depressed, thanks to you. More terrified, less depressed! I'll take that. It's good knowing I'm not alone.

Andi



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