A bit of Advice About Privacy

[Joel E.]

If you are just starting out, or merely considering transitioning, privacy is in important subject to bear in mind. When you do chose to tell the people in your life about your transition, you should consider how and when you will do it. You may want to start by confiding in a trusted friend, family member, or counsellor. You may chose to speak to people in a support group in person, or online (like Transgenderzone ). If you 'come out' about being transgendered in an online forum, you will want to use an alias, and take care when giving out any specific personal details. The thing is that this is a very public forum and you never know who may be reading. If you want your friends and family to find out about your desire to transition in a time and manner of your choosing you should protect your privacy when you post anything online, whether it is here or any network or forum.

Likewise, you should be careful with the people you know in real life. Many folks are very accepting of transexuality these days. But some people still haven't come around. So think carefully when you confide in some one. Hopefully you will find plenty of love and acceptance when you transition, but it is important to know that you may find hesitance, fear, anger, or even in some extreme cases, violence. I believe that if you are cautious and realistic in your approach to transitioning you will be far more likely to have a good experience. It can all sound a bit frightening. It is the beginning of a long and complex journey. But it is one that saved my life.

[quackers]

Well in this day and age, privacy is hard to come by. I'm on a teacher's website and am out as trans. People have listened to what I have had to say if anything is trans related and hope it has helped. To be honest, it would not take much effort to track me down in the real world.

Going stealth is not an option for me - even in the future unless I change my name again, shut down my websites and don't go on any forums.

And I'm pretty certain I've probably been talked about on some local children's Facebook page. I am reasonably careful what I write in my blogs - there is stuff that I haven't shared because I know it is an open forum. Only some people who I have met and talked to in real life know some of it.

[Joel E.]

Going stealth is not an option for me - even in the future unless I change my name again, shut down my websites and don't go on any forums.

There are many people for whom stealth is not an option. I have been lucky enough to live in stealth for the past decade, but it did require many changes, a tremendous amount of work, and moving across the Atlantic ocean. I have great respect for people who are 'out' about being trans and are able to be good role models and change society's views about trans people. Quackers, It sounds like you are one of those people. But I also feel that it is a fair and reasonable goal, for some, to live in stealth. And I think we need to acknowledge and protect people's rights to do so.

The intention behind my original post, however, was to address the privacy issues that one faces when one is just 'coming out' about being trans. It can be a very tricky time. And I am glad I don't have to do that again!

[thedreadpersephone]

Hi Joel,

Maybe it's an idea to make this a sticky post?

[Joel E.]

Thanks TDP, good idea.