Views on straight men who prefer trans women and general femininity

[chloe jane oliver]

This is a complex, controversial subject and difficult to keep short. I can only tell you my own personal experiences.
Over the last ten years I have dated several men and gone through changes in my own perception of how I should present myself. Most men are attracted to stockings, high heels, etc etc. However I have also found that just as many men are attracted to a well dressed woman - what I would call classy. Initially to attract a man I would wear the former and did indeed attract a great deal of attention, especially as I am blessed with legs that any woman would be proud of. However these men without exception only wanted me for one thing, and were pretty insensitive about the fact I am trans and my feelings about that.
When one winter I stopped wearing mini skirts, high heels, stockings etc, (not that I wore stockings "with" mini skirts) and changed to wearing more upmarket branded cloths ( admittedly still with high heels, they show of my legs) I noticed just as many men were paying me attention. The difference was that these men were genuinely shocked to learn I am trans and treated more like a natural woman.
I have been fortunate enough to meet a very charming man who opens doors for me, pulls the chair out for me in a restaurant etc. He often tells me I don't need to wear makeup and encourages me to wear flat shoes. He has stood by me through a difficult year of chemo treatment for cancer. He loves me for who I am "not" what I am. Am I more feminine than a cis woman? I don't believe so. I am not always dressed in nice cloths, I certainly don't wear labeled cloths to do the housework and I don't do my hair and nails every morning. However when the housework is done I don't slob around in my work cloths,I do shower and change into something nicer.

So my opinion is that how men treat you depends on how you present yourself to them and how you treat them. This is the same for all women irrespective of whether you are trans or a genetic female. Think of it this way. If you started a relationship with man who was smartly dressed, polity, courteous, caring and attentive, but then started slobbing around in old shabby cloths, took no notice of you, didn't care and swore at you, would you stay with him, or would you start looking around for that smart considerate man again???

Chloe.